The Not So Great About Ghanaian Women

May 6, 2011 § 2 Comments

Now that I’ve said a few nice things about Ghanaian women, it’s only fair to offer some criticism. So here goes…

  1. Copping an attitude for absolutely no reason is not playing hard to get or flirting, it’s having an attitude. We’re not characters in some Ghanaian movie. It’s not a turn on. Don’t do it.
  2. Answering that phone when it’s not an emergency; calling, texting, flashing, bbm-ing, or getting on twitter while we’re out doing a 1-on-1 thing is very rude. I also think they’re antiquated, so don’t think you’re impressing anyone with that blackberry. It doesn’t make you cool. It just makes you a d-bag.
  3. Don’t tell me about that small business you want to start, or hint at that gift you’d like to have a day after I met you. I’m not a bank. I just met you, and unless I think you’re marriage material, don’t expect much if anything from me.
  4. If you’re going to wear that weave, wig, or perm, wear it properly, or don’t wear it at all. The same goes for wearing makeup. There’s nothing uglier than someone looking like a clown in this searing heat. Learn to keep your sh*t together.
  5. Yes, my accent is different from yours. No, this doesn’t mean you need to change yours to mimic mine or switch entirely to English when we’re speaking Twi. 1. I’m not impressed. 2. This doesn’t help me practice my Twi, which is what I want. & 3. Don’t give me more reminders of how much I dislike when people do that.
  6. Just because I’m talking to you doesn’t mean I want you. Just because I’d like to see you again or want to know more about you doesn’t mean we’re now an item, or that I should start preparing myself to meet your parents.
  7. Please, please, please, please don’t use your facebook status as a play-by-play of your personal life. We really do not need to know how you wish you were married, why that unnamed boyfriend-to-be hasn’t called and what you should do about it, or use your status to solicit advice on how to get a man 6 hours after you’ve announced how much you’re in love with a guy. Wanna know how not to get a man? Read the 10 status messages you wrote in the last two days!
  8. Please don’t wear those stripper outfits. The skirt that barely covers your ass, the faux knee-high imitation leather boots, the bright pink fleece top, being a size 20+ and spilling out of a size 6, or wearing super tight spandex in this hot weather is not sexy even if that echo chamber around you keeps telling you otherwise. To borrow a quote from Dave Chappelle, “that thing you have on is a whore’s uniform.” It’s the height of kurasesem.
  9. Lastly, your face is the part of you we get to see most often. Try to give it some decent attention. There are too many of you who are perfect dimes, but have faces that fall far behind. Some of the prettiest women I’ve seen in my life are Ghanaian so don’t come to tell me I’m not being fair. Try not to feed that false stereotype that Ghanaian women have “great bodies but no face.”
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