So You Want To Date A Ghanaian Girl?

October 27, 2011 § 5 Comments

I find some of the search terms people use to find my blog pretty interesting. It’s like a lil’ window into how and what we think in private. I reckon a good 1/3rd of these hits are about dating Ghanaian women, their butts, or whether rape is justified. I wrote something about the subject and like most of my entries, it was quickly forgotten. Honestly, I’d barely remember what I’d write 24 hours after it’s posted. But some sick bastards keep reminding me about it. Thankfully, I’m sure they won’t get through a line of that long essay. I would add, though, that I’m a bit…ok, a lot concerned about what google knows about me now. Not just me. These guys probably know far more about you and me than all the people we know in this world. And that is a very disconcerting feeling to have.

Anyway, some of those search queries and several email questions I’ve gotten about Ghanaian women inspired this entry. I usually don’t write until I’m really moved by something. Unfortunately, it’s often the crap I see and sometimes experience, which can be a bit tiresome. It’s like going to church every Sunday and always hearing that you’re a sinner and will be going to hell if… who wants to hear that all the time? So, I’m going to say a few things about Ghanaian women [again]. The first was just me doing my own thing. This is for those who are a bit clueless about all these women walking around Accra (or Ghana). I’d say something about Ghanaian men, but I’ve found most (after meeting them) are not impressive – even the few ones who like wear their Yale/Harvard degrees like it’s the be-all/end-all.

Naturally, you should be forewarned: these are just my opinions, so if you’re a Ghanaian woman and mistakenly find this, don’t get your panties in a bunch because I said something that bothered you. The point is for others to get a bit more insight about the faces they see and the people they might meet. I can’t tell you who to go for, but I can tell you what to avoid.

–          So… you want to date a Ghanaian woman? Why? You saw one or two with nice butts and you got hot and bothered? 90% of Ghanaian women have nice butts, and maybe 95%+ have big breasts so take that out of your search parameters. I’ve seen enough of these all my life. Hell, there are enough of them in my family to last a lifetime. So look past that.

–          Faces. This is a tough one, but I’ll have to admit a clear majority of Ghanaian women don’t have attractive faces. The problem stems from neglect, ignorance about skincare, the sun, misuse of make-up, “creams,” and a serious lack of Noxzema and Neutrogena in this country. You’ll easily find lots of women who easily trump the JLo’s and Halle Berrys of this world when it comes to bodies, but their faces tell a different story. If a girl can’t seem to maintain a healthy skin tone and that’s important to you, avoid her. It’ll bug you sooner or later, especially since her skincare habits are not going to change overnight because you’re in the picture.

–          Skin. Does she have very uneven skin tone? She has this fair skin, but her neck, knuckles, elbows, knees, feet, and maybe the back of her ears look much darker. When you see this, smile and walk away… unless that’s your thing. Too many Ghanaian women are bleaching their skin and are too stupid to care about the possible consequences of their behavior for the coming years. If you’re just looking for a short fling, it’s the perfect bait. If you want something long term, know that in 5 years, she’ll have graying and blackening patches of skin and will look 15 years older than her age. Leave those alone.

–          She’s always in these skimpy outfits. She’s always changing her hair style. I know, black women do this often, but…every other week is a bit much. She’s always hoochiefied, yet she tells you she’s single. She might even tell you about how she’s just left a relationship where she found out her ex was cheating on her. She’s also currently unemployed. STAY AWAY! These women are pathological liars! Where do you think she got funds to pay for her upkeep? How does she feed herself if she’s unemployed, or get around, or pay for her phone credits? I don’t need to tell you that there are men (yes, MEN) paying for her to look as she does. Ghanaian women (at least, the ones you should avoid) have mastered and become accustomed to having men on rotation, AND they’re perfectly comfortable with it. You’ll just be a new addition in their rolodex, and being the broni or returnee, you’re prime real estate. You’re the golden goose she’s been waiting for.

–          You saw her on Oxford Street (or one of these enclaves where expats hang out) in the middle of the day in her late-evening outfit. She was probably sitting in front of Frankie’s, totally glammed and rocking some bomber shades. They’re always there. She’s waiting for you. Stay away. Perchance you mistakenly take one of these floozies out and she orders something expensive but can’t eat it…she drops subtle hints about material things she likes…she talks about some project (often school) she’d like to pursue, but can’t because of money woes…she NEVER calls you, and when you call, the calls are brief due to “network issues,” but when you’re around her, she seems to get numerous calls from “friends.” (“he’s my friend,” she’ll say) DELETE her number!

–          Can you see her without having to spend money? Can you find situations where you can get to know her without having to spend money for at least 3 weeks? Do you find she calls you as much as you call her? Is she ok with some measure of physical contact in public (remember, if you’re on rotation, you can’t be seen as more than friend)? She doesn’t think being pretentious or rude as flirting. If you get ‘yes’ to these questions, you’re on the right track. Also, this one is a bit tricky because most Ghanaian women think of being bitchy as a way of telling guys they’re interested. Are we still in 2nd grade? If it annoys you and you have no patience for it like me, cut her off. She’ll get the hint very quickly…although some don’t take too kindly to being dropped.

–          These last two are important: first, if you really want to date a Ghanaian, find a Ghanaian woman who has lived abroad (I’m not referring to the school-and-then-returned ones), or someone who lived here, but is now abroad with her mate (often married with kids) and have them be your filter. They’ll be best at telling you what to avoid and what’s good. The second is this: make sure you pursue someone you believe MEASURES UP TO OR CAN MEASURE UP TO YOU IN EVERY WAY. Can you see yourself introducing her to your closest friends or family? If so, you might have a keeper. If you have even the slightest sense of doubt, it’s best to avoid her and move on.

Now, go out there and find that beautiful Ghanaian girl!

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§ 5 Responses to So You Want To Date A Ghanaian Girl?

  • Wooow!!! (writing with a broad smile). I read a past blog of yours and I was entertained as well as educated.

    It is hard to find the best match most of the times. In my humble opinion, I think these stereotypes are common to all nationalities and both sexes(men might exhibit it in different ways due to testosterones). These characteristics may come about due to socio economic set backs.

    Exposures to the hussles and bustles of life may also model the individual where relationships are concerned. A person might learn to conform if they want a relationship/marriage to succeed.

    A relationship might start in a good way and end in bad way or vice versa. It is kind of no respecter of persons.

    • Mike says:

      Hi Naa!
      I agree with you on everything, but I find it hard accepting the idea that people “might learn to conform..” we are creatures of habit, and I fear if some of these habits started early on (I’ve seen teens in my village doing this juggling act). I wonder if they’ll be able to change when a really good guy comes along. Thanks for the read, btw! 🙂

  • Nana says:

    Spot on!! Our young women should be educated to stop seeing men as meal tickets and start being self sufficient from an early age, the world is changing and if they want the men to respect them they really need to change their attitude.

  • GADEL says:

    Hi Mike,

    You’ve got some great points here. Thanks for writing this.

    Delali

  • Edem says:

    very true…………………………………………………………………………………

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