Marriage…Or Something Like It

March 7, 2013 § 12 Comments

Normally, I’d let my thoughts marinate for a while before writing, but I fear the lights will be out when I get home (I’m at aunt’s in legon), and I would’ve lost all interest in this.
So, let’s see how to wrap your minds around my thought processes.

I’m 32 years old and after a smatter of dating encounters, I’m happily single. No, really; I am!! I don’t need the games. I don’t need the attitude; or any drama that comes within and without.

I also have had a lil’ catharsis of sorts: I miss white women 😦 No, it’s not exactly what you’re thinking. But I do miss being around a woman with western sensibilities. This local sh*t ain’t cuttin’ it for me. It’s so dry (mimic a middle-aged Greek New Yorker when you read that)!

The whole black woman thing started being a cute novelty thing. But once you get past that round butt, they start losing major points. And since none bears that golden coochie to justify all the BS any man like me will eventually have to put up with, I think it’s time to return to the tried and realiable.

I’m not bashing your sisters, or moms or daughters, so save your needless venom. Nor am I saying I prefer one color over another. I just realize we…just…don’t…RELATE. I’m an agnostic theist. I won’t go to church or worship the bible. I love kissing. I don’t like “african movies.” I don’t like skanky outfits. I like my woman to understand the meaning of good skin care. I could go on and on…
I even thought sex would be the great equalizer, but you were too busy reading that bible to learn where your clitoris is, and therefore totally clueless about sex (as you’ve prob already accepted yours is to lay there until I’m finished because the ring I gave you gives me that right), and therefore serious suck at it (no pun intended). Or you’re too comfy with a plethora of dicks plowing your worn out cookie as long as money or presents follow, and that isn’t a good option for me either.
I know…I know. I’m exaggerating and I’m probably being mean (again). Yes, I know. But this is my limited experience. Show me something else, and I’ll sing those praises here. Until then…

So, this leaves us…me, being a lil’ happy alone. But alone doesn’t exactly get me my 3 kids. I know of those other options, but call me old fashioned. I like things ooo na-tu-ral.
Let’s clarify something here: my angsts are solely about local Ghanaian women. This is not about all black women.

Ok. Back to my options..
Aunt 1 opines and randomly suggests arranged marriages. “They still do it,” she says. “If you want, we can arrange one…” That met a resounding, but kind ‘no, thanks!’
Adopted cuz/sis giddly impresses upon me to marry a white girl “please, marry one! I’ve always loved mixed babies. You know, if I had my way and I wasn’t with my bf…” You can guess the rest. We just had to laugh hysterical at that sincerity in her seriousness.

Then just this afternoon, aunt 2 adds her bit, which I’ve heard about 50 times already. Do I have a glaring neon sign that says “desperately seeking!”? I’d love to add to my brood of 7…i.e., the ones I can’t return when they become too much. But does it have to be through marriage?

Yes, I probably should’ve married that right girl before coming here. Lots of shuda, coulda, wouldas. Honestly, if you are single and contemplating a long-term stay here, bring your partner. Don’t come to look for one here.

Meanwhile, I just want my 3 kids; 1 for starters. She can even be a surrogate, or that well-timed knock-up. The bff doesn’t like that last idea.

What to do..
My banku beckons, so we’ll cont. this later.

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§ 12 Responses to Marriage…Or Something Like It

  • Yaa says:

    Pfff! man, you are in trouble, but on the brighter side miracles do happen so you might meet a compatible partner. huh.

    • Mike says:

      I’m in trouble alright, but I’d rather be where I am: free and learning. Than thrust into a situation we’d both be miserable about 5, 6 down the line- with kids in tow.

  • Yvonne says:

    Michael…I seriously have someone in mind…..I am really serious….let me know if it’s an option for you…start by talking….hehehehehe

  • Chris says:

    Ach, boy if you knock ANYONE up I WILL CUT IT OFF!!! Akola wei b3 ma me heart attack! I do appreciate your candidness about where you are right now. So many people don’t have that honest assessment of themselves and in the end, it’s all heartache!

  • Jean says:

    I was amused by the offer of arranged marriage from your female friend.

    But hey, even in North America some parents try to steer things.

  • Lady Jaye says:

    True, true, but you will also be surprised at the quite sizable minority of men and women who share your religious sensibilities and lack thereof as well as a westernized outlook on life. You just don’t seem to be in the right places/ meeting the right people πŸ™‚

    • TrueCoaster says:

      Ohhh, Ms. LadyJayWah! Do you suggest the likes of yourself… or just…yourself, in any case?

      Lololol just messing.

      But, Mike, this was a depressingly non-engaging post relative to your others. And aside a few sharp pangs (I’m a Christian), I felt little.Reads a bit like a repetitive/dragged out argument. Hmm…but I do understand it’s your life and life isn’t always as tasty as alunguntugui, despite popular belief.

      Anyway, Lady Jaye’s right. In today’s Ghana, there are many who would share your ideals and values, etc so shine your eye and don’t give up!

      • Mike says:

        my last two entries have been different from the others. I wrote them on the fly (in a taxi and hotel lobby), and not behind my laptop where my thoughts are usually more organic. So, forgive me for that. I rarely find time to write these days. But will probably write something soon. No more marriage talk, though. I gotta keep that off my diary.

  • S.l. says:

    A great blog to read… πŸ˜€ I hope youll write more! Im an European living in Accra with my Ghanaian boyfriend!

  • Dela says:

    Oh Mike found a woman he likes in Ghana? Please write more. We want to hear it all.

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